Nice Guy’s Finish Last?
Are you like many other nice guys that had bad luck with women? Have you ever developed a big crush on a woman, acted like a complete gentleman, even gone out of your way for her but still end up rejected by her for a jerk who you know won’t treat her right? In other words, the type of men we refer to as “bad boys”, “charmers”, and/or “playas”. Do women mostly see you more as just a friend or a brother and not as boyfriend material or a romantic interest all because you’re “too nice”? If so, don’t worry you’re not the only guy with this problem. This guide will give all nice guys out there some key dating tips on how to use those bad boy or charming qualities that women love while maintaining your nice guy personality.
What Are Bad Boys Like?
Take some time and think for a moment. What so appealing about bad boys that most women go for them? Well lets see, they can be unpredictable, fun, mysterious, spontaneous, and most importantly show a lot of confidence. The only rules they obey are their own and they don’t let anyone control them.
You don’t need to be a daredevil to win women over but try suggesting activities you don’t normally do in the heat of the moment. They don’t have to be way out there or crazy to succeed. Say for example, trying something new that you always wanted to try with her or going someplace new where you’ve never been and experiencing it with her for the first time. It’s very possible to be mysterious and unpredictable in a good way without breaking your own code or principles.
Try waiting a while before you call her after getting her phone number or after the first date. Let her keep guessing whether you’ll call or not. In general, women love a challenge and don’t want a man that’s too easy for them to catch. If you’re always playing it safe and being predictable their won’t be too much fun in your life.
Be The Man
You Wear The Pants
What most women want are men who will be confident, decisive, and dependable to handle things. When you’re out on your date, take charge but don’t push it. Remember to plan ahead so you can always have a backup plan in case something goes wrong. Always be adaptable to different situations, for example if she hates a certain type of food or she mentions how her favorite band is in town for one night only, be ready for these things.
You don’t have to break your bank to show her a good time either. Think of dates that won’t cost you too much money without looking cheap but being thoughtful at the same time. These type of dates include a museum, miniature golf, even the zoo. Not only will these dates save you money but it’ll also show you that that you don’t have to spoil her rotten to win her heart or just show her a good time. If she’s really into you she’ll enjoy your company anyway.
Be Fun And Generous
Remain lighthearted and upbeat about things or basically be more open. Don’t act like a nervous or needy guy (even if you feel that way) when you’re on your date the key is to not let it show. The date should be kept humorous and fun while you keep your attention on her. By doing this, you’re able to take a lot of the focus off you and this will help you look plus feel more confident.
Of course, it goes without saying because if you’re a nice guy you already know to be a gentleman. Basic examples include offering to pick up the tab unless she insists on paying, opening doors for her, letting her go first, etc… you get the idea. However, again don’t be “too nice” otherwise you’ll come off as desperate.
Pay Attention And Communicate
Nearly all women prefer to communicate verbally and love a good listener this is where most nice guys shine (as long as you remain focused on her). You’ll impress her by remembering important things about her for example her favorite color, pet’s name, favorite song. If you’re looking to meet a woman online, check over her profile to come up with questions you can ask her about and what interests her.
Work with what you have by making the most of your looks. You don’t have to be a pretty boy for this to work but you should dress nice. Look over your attire, accessories, and personal grooming judging yourself fairly. Try to get feedback, ask a friend if possible a female friend for her honest input. You can always get tips from other sources online or from TV as well. Being well groomed and looking good gets a woman’s attention.
Stand Up For Yourself
Develop a backbone and continue living your life don’t let her control it by becoming her puppet. Dating a woman doesn’t automatically mean you have to stop doing what you love like hanging out with friends or enjoying your hobbies. You never know how long a relationship will last so just be yourself. For example, if you already planned on going out with your friends and she wants you to do something with her instead its okay to go out with your friends. For us nice guys saying no can be difficult but if she truly likes you she’ll only respect you for that kind of decision and come to appreciate the time you spend together more.
As an alternative to this, you could always suggest doing something together some other time in the near future. For example, offering to take her some place where she’s wanted to go or do something together with her that she’s wanted to do for a while now.
Is She Really For You?
Where would you rank her on a scale from 1-10? Keep in mind, you have the right to rate her too its not all about the woman in a relationship. Ask yourself is she worth going out with again? Would she really make a good girlfriend? Just because she’s smart, classy, and attractive doesn’t mean she’s right for you.
Does she treat you right? Does she have a kind heart? What about her self-esteem? Is she generous? If its a long term relationship you’re going for can you still see yourself together with her in 10-20 years? What about after her hot body or pretty face aren’t as attractive anymore? Will you still want to be with her?
As women get older the good news is that they’re more likely to want to date nice guys. Especially if they’ve come out of a horrible relationship with a bad boy or just had bad experiences with them and learned from it. Build a list of the good qualities you have to offer women and just keep improving yourself. Believe in yourself and realize how good of a catch you are then act like it.
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